Scott, To Be Certain


Wednesday, January 04, 2006

A Place I've Previously Been (But Not Recently)

So first things first.

And second things second.

Whoops, that would be first things second!

Let me start again. What I actually meant was to invoke Madonna's forthcoming single in the following unambiguous fashion.

It's been a long time between posts. 2006 will rectify that, never you fear (e.g. about 2006 not rectifying that).

I guess the soul-destroying release of "A Place I've Never Been", Kate De Rouge's powerful and moving ode to ARIA chart places 1 through 9, must have had a more profoundly negative effect on me than I realised.

But 2006 is a new year and S2BC will be focussing on more important issues, i.e. will become fucking rife with shit you couldn't even imagine anyone bothering to commit time to.

For example, I'm hoping to get Australian distribution rights to the following cinematic opus.

Anchored by a haunting central performance from Camryn Manheim as Christy Turlington, "Farinelli 2: The Bronx" tells the gripping tale of one Ed Burns, a self-obsessed aspiring film-maker, whose horrendous childhood castration at the hands of his wicked stepmother (Judy Nunn) and subsequent involuntary enrolment in vocal training as a promising New York soprano failed to keep him from realising his dream of making dreadful self-obsessed Hollywood films. Featuring a layered, subtle screenplay from the prodigious combined talent of Tyra Banks and Kathleen Turner and a pivotal dance sequence choreographed by Shaunice feat. Dr Dre, 8ball, Bone Thugs N Harmony and Debra Byrne, “Farinelli 2” will have you screaming with laughter. Directed by Lasse Holstrom.

I know. Box office gold!

Separately, I'm collaborating with the splendiferous Fop to dramatise the truly heartbreaking trials and tribulations of the non-farming McLeod sisters and their foolhardy but loyal cleaner, Rosetta Mulligrub (captured unawares below in screen-testing).

It's going to be a big year! Do hang around.


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