Scott, To Be Certain

DISCOURSE, DIGRESSION AND DIATRIBE FOR YOUR DAILY DIGESTION

Monday, October 22, 2007

"Do What You Do, Say What You Say": Inside The Vast Mauboy Oeuvre



Jessica 'Rhinestone' Mauboy was last year's Idol darling, using her runner-up status to catapult herself into the coveted Young Divas place vacated by Ricki-Lee (ignoring the latter's pleas not to touch it).

In addition, this year Jessica is the face (and hair) of Head & Shoulders, a fact reinforced by repeated airings of the relevant ad approximately 25 times per Idol episode.

It's a corker of an ad, about 20 seconds long, featuring a haunting performance by Jessica. On the whole, it is a stunning contribution to pop music:



In the ad, Jessica plays an enormous star with full-bodied hair, making references to bothersome ever-present spotlights and a need to remain presentable under them (see also above photo for irrefutable evidence).

Putting the Academy on notice, she delivers a convincing portrayal of somebody who actually has recorded output as a music artist. This is principally thanks to the rousing lyric of the song she performs in the ad:

"Do what you do/Say what you say/You know it's not over..."

This amazing lyric is so stirring and anthemic that we all instantly want to adopt it as our personal slogan. In fact, it's possible there hasn't been such a socially unifying act in this country for many years.

Is it too late to submit it for the ARIAs? This is surely one of the finest 4 seconds of songwriting genius the world has seen, devastatingly performed by Jessica, and dandruff-free to boot. What more could you possibly want from a pop icon?

To join this superstar's fan club and access her vast back catalogue of other imaginary hits, click here.

Please note that my review of last night's Idol may appear a day or two late this week. But don't fret: it will appear. Because I DO WHAT I DO and SAY WHAT I SAY. Know what I'm sayin'?

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21 Comments:

  • At 8:59 AM, October 22, 2007, Blogger Adem IAR said…

    My friends and I have been discussing the brilliance of this snippet of song for weeks now. I must have it; maybe the Young Diiiiffa's can record it??

     
  • At 1:24 PM, October 22, 2007, Blogger Kamikaze Camel said…

    I've always wondered if it was an actual song. I even googled the lyrics and came up with nothin...

     
  • At 2:16 PM, October 22, 2007, Blogger Woodsman said…

    I love that she even has "white-skirt" confidence in the ad - we all know that is the strongest confidence a lady can have.

     
  • At 5:42 PM, October 22, 2007, Blogger PopGoesCanberra said…

    Oh gosh this white skirt thing is bizarre.

     
  • At 7:27 AM, October 24, 2007, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    You did what you had to do, and I thank you for it.

    (weasel)

     
  • At 3:38 PM, October 24, 2007, Blogger comicstriphero said…

    I'm starting up a slow hand-clap for your review post...

     
  • At 4:09 PM, October 24, 2007, Anonymous FranklinBluth said…

    *clap*

     
  • At 5:45 PM, October 24, 2007, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    *clap*.....*clap*

     
  • At 6:53 PM, October 24, 2007, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    *clap* *clap* *clap*

    You said one or two days late... it's now getting to three!

    Such, I suppose, it the convenience of doing what you do and saying what you say, rather than doing what you say!

    (weasel)

     
  • At 10:52 AM, October 25, 2007, Blogger Rowena said…

    Handclap is speeding up now...

    *clap clap clap clap*

     
  • At 2:51 PM, October 25, 2007, Blogger that's mister nora to you, sonny said…

    CLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPetc

    xoxo nora

     
  • At 4:04 PM, October 25, 2007, Anonymous Manxzilla said…

    For Christ's sake Scott, I can't take it any more! WHAT DID YOU THINK OF MATT CORBY'S COUTURE ON MONDAY NIGHT'S ELIMINATION SHOW?

     
  • At 5:22 PM, October 25, 2007, Blogger comicstriphero said…

    Toying with us, aren't you.

    C'mon! Us public servants are in caretaker mode - I can only file for so many hours in a day.

    I have set aside hours each day to read blogs. You're not helping me reach that quota.

     
  • At 10:36 PM, October 25, 2007, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I think the clap peaked to soon, I'm going to slow it down to a gentle yet encouraging
    clap..... clap..... clap..... clap....clap....

     
  • At 11:35 PM, October 25, 2007, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Scott, this is intolerable. I only watched Idull this week to be able to enjoy your blog.

    I've had my share of hearts broken and I don't want to take this any more!

    (weasel)

     
  • At 8:43 PM, October 26, 2007, Blogger EuroTrash said…

    It feels like mummy and daddy have had a divorce and daddy's gone away inexplicably.

    This is making me feel sad.

    Come back Scott! Our collective heart yearns for you!

     
  • At 12:11 PM, October 27, 2007, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I hope you're ok. I'm starting to suspect that you have been rushed to hospital or arrested

     
  • At 12:36 PM, October 29, 2007, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Scott, where are you? We (your adoring public) need you! Have you been kidnapped by the forces of boredom? Your blog is our elixir, especially during this dire Idol. Can we help you to resume communication?

    The Penguin.

     
  • At 3:28 PM, October 29, 2007, Blogger Kamikaze Camel said…

    Seriously. We need to know what you think of Tarisai!! Fake or Not Fake?

     
  • At 4:35 PM, October 29, 2007, Blogger Scott said…

    HELLO EVERYONE.

    My apologies for causing concern and for neglecting my duties.

    Weasel, your Kylie lyrics straight from this blog's namesake song warmed my heart. You made me feel like I'd like I'd driven my baby blog into a Winchelsea dam on Father's Day.

    Never again. Thank you to you all for your kind words.

    KC: Tarisai is an annoying little shit who I dare say is next to exit the competition, but I don't think her performance last night demonstrated any of the hallmarks they're suggesting.

     
  • At 8:02 PM, March 17, 2011, Anonymous buy zenegra online said…

    HI,
    Nice video posted here..Really very nice.. Thanks for posting this blog....

     

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